Friday, December 23, 2016

Comfortable with Myself

So this blog post is a tad bit personal as I have noticed some changes in myself that has been building up since my first AmeriCorps experience and I wanted to take the time to do some self reflection. Note: I will not be going into full detail and this post will be relatively short. 

I would say that for the most part I have lived in a bubble. Always played it safe, always tried to please others while I myself remained miserable. Growing up, I read a lot. I read about various places -fictional and non-fictional, and lived vicariously through what I have read because the best words to describe my life at that point would be "boring" and "predictable" and "safe". The inner me screamed for adventure, to let go and take some risks.

I never danced in front of others.  Unless, you were one of my closest family members, then you never got to see my skills I have been honing over the years - not to say that I'm good by any means because I'm not. I never sang in front of others and I readily admit that I sound something akin to nails scraping against a chalkboard but I revel in doing so anyways.

My first big risk was packing up all of my things and moving to Florida to start a new job. I'm not going to go into details about this as you can check out my City Year post for this information but I must say that this was the starting point for me actually coming to terms that there was/is so many things I didn't know and that I wasn't living my life for me.

Being around so many excepting people has encouraged me to come out of my shell more and express who I really am. Because of this, I'm now starting a dance/exercise club at my site as my students think I'm "mahay be" at dancing. I have many initiatives that I'm working on at my school and I'm excited to see all of it come to fruition. 

When you finally take off the mask, the truth is that some people are going to love the beauty that has finally been revealed while others aren't - they'll question and assume to validate who they are and where they are in life. Be thankful and take them as what they are but don't let that be your focus.

So, I've changed... for the better. I'm more outgoing and I take more risks. 

To end this, I want to encourage you to be you proudly and freely. Know yourself so you can know your worth then you will accept nothing less. 



In all things, keep God first